parties and peanuts

Well, I always said I could do better when I saw those empty dance floors, DJ’s playing the same records twice in 2 hours, and thinking "I’ll just play Smells Like Teen Spirit, that’ll make them happy". And now, in all modest honesty, I think I did. If you can measure a DJ’s success by movement on the dance floor, I beat all of them easily. I’ll be the first to admit, it’s not nearly as easy as it looks. Of course I didn’t expect it to be any other way. But that night I proved that it is possible, not even that hard to Watch The Damn Dancefloor and play what They like to hear.

Strange thing is, I didn’t even play any Tool. At all. I wanted to nearing the end, but my friend had already gone home, taking the albums with him. Kyuss: nope. APC: hardly if at all. Usually those are the exact bands I request at a party and they never play, and I always thought that, if I’d ever organise a party, it’d be full of those.

Nevertheless, it’s very satisfying to see a bunch of people freak out on the music you play, not one bit caring about how it looks to the people at the bar, only there for the beer. Trust me, if there really is nothing better than sex, a good party makes a tie. For one night the world outside ceases to matter, just us and the music do.

So yeah, I’m glad I did it. It’s been a few days of absolute stress (holy sweet and sour shit, STRESS!) and frustration, but the result was very much worth the energy. A friend made me quite a compliment when he noted ‘Wow man, you’ve done your homework!’ In fact there were 3 of us behind the tables, a black metal-type guy, one hardcore/metalcore, and then me, master of pussy new-metal and heavy metal. This was a great thing because it made it possible for us to let the others do theirs for a few songs and get whiplashed on the dancefloor. The black metal albums weren’t played at all, sadly. Heh we simply ran out of time. But anyway.

I was congratulated by several people, which made any stress or effort more than worth it. I’ve been asked if I’m going to do something the like again someday, but I doubt it. Maybe, after another 20 parties with lame DJ’s. But the reason of this party was me wanting to prove to myself I could indeed do better, and I think I succeeded. So I don’t think there will be a second party. But who knows. Or maybe I’ll find some other challenge. I’m starting to like it.

The guy who rented me the place, however! I don’t know what made him think he had found someone competent to place behind the bar, but in my humble opinion he couldn’t have been more wrong. The guy was constantly arrogantly staring at us, and treated his customers like shit. The owner, however friendly at first I must say, wasn’t much different. He made 300 euros, 30 of which were mine. When I said ‘oh, nice.’ he matter-of-factly noted ‘no, not really.’ Apparently this was the worst night he had in months. Although I can hardly believe that because the place is usually empty, regardless of what music is playing.


‘Peanut?’ -‘Yes, I’ll have a peanut. In fact, I’ll just have one and then test my character by not having another one for the rest of the evening.’ And for the rest of the evening, I teased him by offering him peanuts.

Honestly man, I don’t know what makes people "test their willpower" by doing such things. Say no to something just to prove they can. Some believe it actually shows character, but in my opinion it just shows an illusion of it.

The whole point of character is when there’s a big fucking dilemma where you have to choose between what should be done and what you Want done. When you almost fail to see the use of going for "what is right" instead of going for self interest. Then is when you ve to rely on character and trust it, remembering what your vision was when you still had a clear view on the matter.

Character is not trained by refusing peanuts. Eventually you’ll just have an extra smoke instead. There is nothing "right" about refusing peanuts, you just tell yourself that through the evening. And if by the next day you still believe that, it’s a ‘Mission Accomplished’ for you, you example of strong personalities all over the globe, you. Oh Come On. It’s an oversimplified far cry from real life situations.

Character is trained by knowing yourself. But for that, of course, you need to be honest with yourself and a lot of people have extreme difficulties with that. If you know what your visions are and have a solid perception of right and wrong (in a very broad sense on the term), you have a stronger character to fall back on in times of difficulty. Know well what your weaknesses are, and next time you’ll be able to compensate them. Know the difference between what you should do and what you would do. The rest is just… peanuts.

Of course, these are just my thoughts. This is how I see it and I write it down to sum it up for myself, not to accuse anyone of having no character where I do.

No, YOU’RE thinking too much again!!


Well, when I was burning the cd’s, 25 in 3 days, I swore to god and the devil I’d reformat my computer in the most painful, horrible way imaginable, so now it’s time to do just that. I am going to enjoy this beyond the point of what’s still healthy. I’ll be sitting here, grinning wide, slowly clicking "yes" when I get another message "Do you wish to reformat?"… "Are you really sure?"… "This will result in the loss of ALL data on the disk! Are you sure?"… "This will shut down my brain and leave me close to death, submitted to your sick will. Are you REALLY REALLY sure??" And I’ll just click.. yes. Slowly, letting my cursor hover over ‘no’ a minute or so. Ahhh my pants are tight. So, here goes nothing. I can’t possibly continue to work with this piece of shit junk.


2 responses

  1. Kwinten

    It rocked indeed!I slept for 2 hours en then went away again, and now it\’s 4:51 am again…This is going to hurt!I hope you changed your pants after that whole reformatting-thingy…C ya soon!the \’metalcore\’ guy,(cool way to point me out, defenitly beats \’tub-o-lard\’)xkwintjexps: that fuck that \’served\’ drinks was on the same train as i did, and i don\’t know what it was, but he wasn\’t feeling too comfy…

    16 October 2005 at 04:54

  2. Lisa

    and where was mention of the american part-time stripper girl that sent you so many mp3\’s? Pffft. fine, don\’t mention me. but if i ever meet you face to face i\’m going to asskick you good before i give you a hug. i\’m glad it worked out. you had me worried for a sec ;)

    18 October 2005 at 17:12

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