The ghost of who?

Girlfriends and I, don’t mix. Either I make them lesbian, or I make them pissed. I’m in a constant dark when it comes to women. Sometimes I suspect them for just wanting to make trouble for the make-up sex.

Of course it’s not that terrible, but although I can usually read people pretty well, I often fail to see what’s right in front of me when it comes to relationships. It requires my girlfriend to actively communicate, which is, let’s be honest, often difficult for women. I guess I just happened to have hit the jackpot on that matter.


While the mother holds her child
Watches him die
Hands to the sky crying,
"Why, oh why?"

Cause I need to watch things die… from a distance
Vicariously I live while the whole world dies
You all needn’t choose your lie

Ladies and gentlemen, Tool. Their new single ‘Vicariously’, to be exact. It came out this week, and the album can be expected first thing in May. It leaked on the internet this week, and of course, I was all over it. Took me long enough to find but eventually someone did that for me. Ohmygod I downloaded music. Hey I would have bought the album but they’re not selling it. I could care less about everyday bands who lose money because of internet piracy, but bands I do really like, I support by actually buying their stuff. But that will have to wait until may.

The song itself is just about as genius as Tool gets, but there’s significant differences with previous work. Tool has always been very progressive and has explored what other things can be done with rhythms, guitar, voice and any combination of them, but this song takes a bit step forward on that matter. I can imagine some fans will not like this change. Tool almost totally abandon any obvious structure in the song and seem to want to focus entirely on the lyrics. Not that previous albums had traditional A-A-B-B sounds, but still the melody wasn’t quite as complex as it is here. I’m sure the theme can be found after listening to it a couple hundred times. The Tool homepage gives a sneak peak, as well as some of the artwork that will be found on the new 10,000 days album.

I listened to the rest of the album a couple times now, but only now melodies are starting to stick. It’s just too much to take all at once, every song is an overload of information on itself. It’d help if lyrics could be found on the internet, which is not the case. That too, will have to wait. The crappy thing about any art is that you need to understand it in order to like it. Music is no different, so although I think this album represents Tool at its very best, I feel that I’m missing out on a lot simply because I don’t Understand it.

Somebody, die and make Maynard god. He’s the only truely evolved man who doesn’t have the arrogance not to share his visions with us.

Maynard turned 42 the 16th, by the way. See? The ages match. He’s my biological father. Daddy.


Here’s a big fucking surprise for us all: After not responding to calls, letters or anything, the landlord who owns the place I was moving into, turns out to have found someone else. That means, that for the goddamn zillionth time, I’ve been spoonfed false hopes and Fucking Lies once again. I swear to anything, I’m getting real tired of this. Who wouldn’t? This is the third time months of preparation and planning have been for nothing. The boxes in my room have been standing there for almost a year now.

My father isn’t exactly too thrilled about me staying much longer, either: I cost him money. The stepmother didn’t like it any better and showed that by discretely banning me from the dinner table for a couple days. She makes me worry I’m really that hard to live with, sometimes. But hey, so what if I am. I’m the one who’s leaving to live on my own.

…Soon. No, really.


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