Birds!

When does innocent flirting become cheating? Is flirting even innocent? Everyone has his own opinion, but when I ask for it, I always get a vague definition of a line that they have often crossed themselves without realizing.

A friend of mine once went up to a girl to flirt, even though he had a girlfriend. "Just to see if he could, if he wanted to" was his explanation. His girlfriend never knew and no harm was done. But hey, if he’d kiss her to see if he could get her into his bed, or screw around to see if she’d swallow "if he asked her to", there wouldn’t be any harm, either, cause I sure as hell wasn’t going to rat on him to his girlfriend.

One person said, that if you say or do things that you wouldn’t when your girl/boyfriend is around, that’s the danger zone. Well if that’s the case, I plead guilty, cause as far as I’m concerned everyone who has a lover, has said things he/she wouldn’t when the other was around. Relationship problems, "she’s good" mentalk, or even telling someone he/she looks good in that outfit.

"I draw the line when my husband would have an emotional and/or physical relationship with another woman." I have emotional relationships with other women. Other men, too. I love them and I’d do anything for them. It’s of course by far not the kind of love I feel for my girlfriend, but I do nonetheless.

The way I see it now, I would never cheat on my girlfriend. I Love Her and the mere thought of being with someone else, ties my stomach in a knot. Of course, plenty of men before me have said what I do, and still ended up in someone else’s bed. I thought I was above all that but experience taught me otherwise. The same goes for my girlfriend. I trust her completely, but I’m still worried sick, occasionally.

I told my girlfriend, if she’d ever cheat on me and she was sorry, she knew she’d never do it again, and she didn’t want it to come between us, she better not tell me. It would wreck me and our relationship. I believe that a relationship is based on sincerity, not honesty. Some things, "harmless" things without meaning, are better left untold. When she asks, I will tell her. When she doesn’t, neither will I. She knows and appreciates this. It’s a thin line however, between being selfish and being considerate. If I’d fuck someone else and I don’t feel sorry, I know I should tell her, she has the right to know. Will I? I hope so. I don’t see me fucking anyone else so I can’t imagine it would be as simple a situation as it might seem now.

 

I just got a lotter in the mail, from the "ministry of employment and work". Part of their job is to double-check the money I and other unemployed people receive. Apparently, they disagree with last month’s payment. You see, I couldn’t put a V (from vacation) on saturday the 15th, because of regulation C13 and C3A. Because of that reason, they disagree with the money transferred. Please respond to this letter with the form included, stating all that stuff that’s on there, with your signature on it. That way we can work out if you really deserve the 6.52 euro that we think you don’t.

Hmm, let’s see, saturday. I was sitting on my lazy ass in Norway, living on cash that I never worked for. Do I deserve that 6.52 euro? Hell no, but you had to go and offer it to me! When I first refused to go ask for unemployment income, people would call me crazy. Now that I did, and receive money I did nothing for, they ask me "hey did you earn that 6.52? We’ll have to check our register." Tell me, who’s crazy here? This was sent to me on a 3 page letter, with 2 signatures on it. This had to be printed, sent, and signed by 2 people. For a handful of change.

Paris is burning down, the west is burning up. Congratulations, the system works! They caught me stealing money that didn’t belong to me! Fucking idiots… They can Keep the money, for all I care. Might even motivate me to get a decent job and fall in line, after all.

 

Apparently I must be a real pest to live with. My father demands 200 euro per month for me to live here. I call it rent money, he calls it "compensation". Somehow I cost him more than 200 euro a month, even though I buy my own food 90% of the time, and only require 1 extra room in the house to heat.

One year ago I told him, I’ll give you one third of my income this month to compensate for what I cost you, because I realized I had pretty much been pushing it around that time. Today, he yells at me about "that promise I made a year ago and never kept", it seems like he assumed I’d do that every month. What can you say to that? "I was only going to pay for that one month"? His argument is, that I live on his money all the time, when he has to tie ends together. If that’s the case, he’s real good at hiding it, going on holiday 4, 5 times a year and living like god in France.

Eventually, I agreed. The way I see it, if I watch out a bit, I can live without it, and, more importantly, it works as hush-money. Whatever he will be getting pissed about, I’ll always have the final answer. I hardly ever really considered him a father, but now he has promoted himself to landlord. Whatever floats his boat.

I fucking hate having to even bother with money. Income, spendings, savings, I feel like a fucking accountant.

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2 responses

  1. Lisa

    f you pay rent though, you\’re entitled to better treatment than your stepmonster gives you. And they cant be dumping their trash in yoru bedroom. if you are paying rent tell them to rent a storage room and actually put their junk in it so you have a room. Duh.

    30 April 2006 at 03:42

  2. Kwinten

    Does the stepmonester pay rent?
    No, she cheats out on the government with a false adress so she can get a full unemployment income PLUS she leaches on your father, being a pest to all who live there.
    And yet she treats us like we are trash…
    A cunt, by any other name, would still stink so rotten.
     
    And i must agree with LeeLee, i\’ve seen the way they treat you and now that you\’re chipping in at least they can treat you as a member of the family. But i know your situation… And i honestly don\’t believe it will change a lot for you and it hurts because i know you deserve better.
     
    On the girlfriend issue, even though i ain\’t got one now, if i was to cheat on her, i\’d go right t straight edge hell. I still don\’t really know if my ex cheated on me or didn\’t and also don\’t know wether or not i\’d want to know.
    Anyways, it don\’t matter much now anymore!
     
    Keep ya chin up!!
     
     
    xkwintjex

    4 May 2006 at 00:47

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