Peace, Love and Cynicism

Valentine’s day passed with only about a dozen little hearts in sight, and I am very grateful for that. The past week was an awesome one and I don’t feel like spoiling it with snuggly-wuggly little couples stabbing my eyes.

Do you know the legend of Saint Valentine? No? Neither do I, and seriously, I don’t give a shit. In fact, it is my right not to give a shit. My ex’ boyfriend (not to be mistaken for my ex-boyfriend) asked me to “take care” of her while he was abroad, and I kindly told him to go fuck himself. Good thing he was drunk. But seriously, since “getting her drunk and raped” isn’t considered romantic enough for today’s society (fucking materialists), so I refuse to bear the burden while someone else gets to run off with the privileges.

I do wish “fuck day” would have been implemented. It was an idea of two guys on a television show: The day before Valentine’s was to become “Fuck Day” (that shit cracks me up) and would officially, for one day, detach casual sex from emotional baggage. Now, I too know that sex can’t compensate for a relationship, but I always wanted to walk up to a girl and ask, “So, you doing anything on fuck day?” Nowadays, no one remembers that show so I’d just get my nuts cracked. Not to mention I had no less than four people staying over on that day and yes, they were all of a female variety, but I like my suggestions not to have an unintentional undertone of “…or else I’ll throw you on the streets”.
Besides, four…? I might not live.

They’re all in Bruges now by the way, which is officially the most romantic city in Eurasia. They promised me they’d get loaded and ruin as many cute couples’ days. I should have married them before they left but that seems counter-productive, somehow. Life goes on.

This is me, in a good mood. Can you tell? It’s as close as I get to being my former, 20-year old self, which raises the question whether I was a happier person back then. Not that it makes a lick of difference.

Oddly enough, I haven’t really spent one moment of this year hating Valentine’s day. Instead, it served as my personal amusement and every moment I was reminded of it, was in jest. Hell, this was fun. We should do this every year.

Alžběta Čížková has written the following reference about you on your profile:

Four girls vs. the one guy and he survived!
Well the main destination of our trip was Bruges, but Maarten and his friends caused, that all of us totally felt in love with Gent. Sweet Valentine´s Bruges was just like something after it (even if vomiting on cute couples of lovers was quite fun)…
Maarten is the coolist guy with the coolist flat (and also a haircut). If you want to taste the best frites in Gent, or to visit „The Vietnam War“ birthday party with free beer (and like a bonus have a great pics of these actions), he is your man!
It really sucks, that my English is so bad, because I would like to chat with him more. His sense of humour and music taste was likeable :)
Thanks a lot!

P.S. My name is written right. He is also clever

It is true. I have a haircut.

Now that my finances are back in place, I subscribed to Capoeira training again. Today is the first class and I won’t be able to go, but that’s okay. At least I know I’m back in action.

I really missed it so much. Indoor training sessions are one thing, but by coming you keep updated on events and workshops, in massive halls or outside in the sun. There is nothing as satisfying as capoeira in open air. Also- I’ll get kicked in the face again. Most fun you can have with your pants on.

When I tell people I do capoeira, their reactions are easily divided into two categories: The first goes “That’s some kind of dance, right?” and the second, “That’s some kind of martial art, right?” Contrary to what you might expect, I am far more annoyed with category two than number one. Because then, the inevitable next question is, “…But it doesn’t really stand up against other martial arts, right?”

This bullshit of “which martial art is TEH GREATEST” needs to end. People are obsessed with who’s the strongest, the fastest, yada yada. They would match every martial art to every other in every possible situation before declaring Muay Thai the ultimate kick-ass method. It’s an attitude sponsored by Hollywood that misses the point in so many ways, it makes everyone dumber just hearing the question asked.

I heard a teacher once ramble about how Raphaelo the TMNT holds his daggers (called sais) wrong, always, without exception. He then demonstrated the proper way, after which a student commented, “So he uses one dagger exclusively for defense? Why not just use a shield, then?”
Why not just bring a gun, then? Why not just let your president nuke the fucker and be done with it? Any more stupid questions?

Martial arts are situation-specific. Learning to disarm an opponent is for situations in which you forgot to bring your assault rifle, obviously. Jiu Jitsu for example is widely considered one of the most effective martial arts, but get this: It has almost no attack moves. Does that make it inefficient? Clearly not.

On top of that, Capoeira, especially Capoeira Angola, distances itself from eastern martial arts by focusing on culture rather than combat. Of course doing a little dance isn’t the most effective way to kill an attacker, but I can guarantee you, it is by far the most exciting. It is rich with rhythm, music and playfulness, and focuses on the fun of beating each other up by not beating each other up and thus ending the fight within twelve seconds.

So how would a capoeirista stand up in a fight? He would certainly have an edge, with trained reflexes and practice in balance, but since capoeira never bothered to enter this cock-race, it wouldn’t hold its ground against a similarly trained martial artist in let’s say, karate. So let’s drop this whole issue, please?


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