Archive for November, 2013

The Demon of Laplace

Well.

Today I finally found my Supertheory of Super-Everything and its continuation in something I did not write. Strangely, considering the theory is about order in its purest form (apparently called determinism), I stumbled upon it in an article about chaos in EOS magazine, my monthly nerdporn.

I read such articles on a regular basis because I find the grey zone between perceived reality and mathematics fascinating. All these articles on chaos are pretty much the same though, bringing up the butterfly effect and countless other anecdotes without getting down and dirty about it.

But this article had the following paragraph (in Dutch):

Faith in complete predictability peaked early 19th century. French mathematician Pierre-Simon Laplace was the main exponent. “Laplace’s Demon” was named after him: An intelligent, supernatural creature that knows the past and future of the universe down to the smallest detail, and knows no uncertainty.

Laplace said this creature could exist, at least in theory. If it knows every particle of matter and the forces working in on it, it could predict the future, from the movement of constellations down to the smallest atom, until the end of days. Radical determinism was born.

The creature wasn’t just named a “demon” on a whim, because a completely deterministic would leave no place for human free will. Every thing would be set in stone.

 

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Expendable

Character traits are a common thing but I’ve begun to suspect that I have 3 different personalities sitting in this abnormally smallish head of mine.

25% of my brain is active while I’m at work. I’ve got something to focus on so nothing is awkward, nothing bothers me too much and long story short, I’m just prince god damn motherfucking charming out there.

Then there’s Mr. 5%, the person I want to be when at home. I go out to enjoy the world, eat healthy because I want to, clean my room and am generally awesome.

The remaining 70% of the time, so basically all the fucking time, I am the most disgusting, lazy, cock sucking asshole of a slob. A person taking up space, an annoyance when he finally decides to leave his room to take a morning piss, only to disappear behind that door again and produce obnoxiously loud sounds of his illegal copy of Starcraft: Heart of the Swarm going on.

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Working Title

My father called me today with the news that a youth friend of mine had died. He was born on the same day as me so he died 4 days before his 29th birthday, of a cerebral hemorrhage in his sleep. Father of a son.
Peacefully. At least they gave him that.

I hadn’t seen him in about 10 years so I was even surprised to remember his full name when looking him up on Facebook. He looks amazingly happy, but then don’t we all? I hope he was.

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Blanks

If you’re an ex-girlfriend of mine, I give you 8 more words (starting now) to fuck off. You won’t like what’s coming.

I remember the last time I was in love like it was yesterday. Ironic, because it was years ago, on Christmas day, and I was alone. I was buying presents- actually a singular present, for my girlfriend, and I had to put everything down for a moment to keep myself from panicking. My chest felt like an old balloon, crackling and threatening to burst as it swelled. I decided to myself that this might be it, this might be the person I want to spend my life with. That I loved her, and had to tell her that as soon as possible.
She broke up with me later that night after a lukewarm argument involving sex.

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Mein dl

MeindlNew shoes! New shoes. If you wanna catch me at my most feminine, watch be buy shoes.
And by most feminine, I mean I walk into the nearest AS Adventure store, find the model that I’m wearing, point at it and say, “Those. Size 34 if you please.”
This time around, they didn’t get it. Apparently, we switched to American sizes years ago and I now have a size 8.
Retarded? Yes very.

I’m not sure what model they are (oh who am I kidding they’re these) but they’re made by Meindl and just about the most comfortable shoes I have ever worn. Five times. This is actually my fifth pair of the same shoe, you see.

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